I have some bad news, folks...

[Dharma]

Thank you for that honor. I have already been awarded the Raven's Wings badge with tobacco leaf clusters. So this honor is much appreciated. When do I get my free commemorative plate and velvet painting? They'll match my naugahyde couch perfectly. 

[JW_Halverson]

Thank you for that honor. I have already been awarded the Raven's Wings badge with tobacco leaf clusters. So this honor is much appreciated. When do I get my free commemorative plate and velvet painting? They'll match my naugahyde couch perfectly.

WHAT?!?!?!  You are summarily stripped of your membership to the SWE for your insensitivity to the plight of the endangered North American Nauga.  Hunted to near extinction in the 1970's for furniture and automotive seat covers, the nauga has shown virtually no increase in population.  I ask everyone in here to inspect their consciences and ask themselves when they last saw a wild nauga. 

I encourage everyone to send me $20 to help pay for a breeding pair of naugas to be used for the support of the Nauga Reintroduction Program. 

[Josh B]

Hold up on the outrage there JW!   The North American nauga has been extinct for quite some time.  I'm reasonably sure that Dharma's couch is made from the Chinese nauga.  I'm 42 and I've never seen an American nauga or American nauga Hyde.  Come to think of it, I've never seen a Chinese nauga on the hoof (foot).  But their hides are not only cheap, but plentiful. By the laws of supply and demand, that would suggest that the Chinese nauga population is doing quite well.  Admittedly I don't know if the Chinese naugas are wild or domestic, so the wild ones might be in peril.  By the way, does anybody have a picture of a wild nauga?  Josh

[mullet]

Josh, the last time I saw one was during the age of the Shagg Carpetioo.

[Dharma]

Josh and Mullet are, indeed, correct. The North American Nauga was hunted to extinction some 5,000 years ago or more. This was due to the efficiency of my ancient ancestor's flintknapping skill in producing the Ronco Point and also the K-Tel Point, which were deadly in penetrating the thick hide of the North American Nauga when affixed to the spear shafts launched from our atlatls. This was, of course, long before we began knapping circular saw blades because we didn't need bows yet. Yes, Naugahyde and a tie-dyed t-shirt. What can I say? We were desperate. Get used to it.

[JW_Halverson]

Josh and Mullet are, indeed, correct. The North American Nauga was hunted to extinction some 5,000 years ago or more. This was due to the efficiency of my ancient ancestor's flintknapping skill in producing the Ronco Point and also the K-Tel Point, which were deadly in penetrating the thick hide of the North American Nauga when affixed to the spear shafts launched from our atlatls. This was, of course, long before we began knapping circular saw blades because we didn't need bows yet. Yes, Naugahyde and a tie-dyed t-shirt. What can I say? We were desperate. Get used to it.

Ronco and K-Tel?  I know the younger folks are scratching their heads on those, but I think I may have to go change my shorts....I laughed pretty dang hard there.

[criveraville]

Man gnats.. You can't help stupid. 

Cipriano

[J05H]

Josh and Mullet are, indeed, correct. The North American Nauga was hunted to extinction some 5,000 years ago or more. This was due to the efficiency of my ancient ancestor's flintknapping skill in producing the Ronco Point and also the K-Tel Point, which were deadly in penetrating the thick hide of the North American Nauga when affixed to the spear shafts launched from our atlatls. This was, of course, long before we began knapping circular saw blades because we didn't need bows yet. Yes, Naugahyde and a tie-dyed t-shirt. What can I say? We were desperate. Get used to it.

Ah the Ronco point. My tribe used to purchase those from yours for just 4 easy payments of a dozen wild turkey feathers each. And we always got a free one to give away.

[Dharma]

But wait! There was more! If you acted then, you would have received a genuine agate jerky slicer ab-so-lute-ly free! How much would you have paid for such a bargain? Not 20, not 10, but only 5 seashells! That's right! Only 5---5!!!---seashells! Still not convinced? What if I told you that we also threw in the much-loved "Goofy Greats" record album, lovingly knapped from clear quartz for crystal listening clarity? Again, ab-so-lute-ly FREE! The whole family would have been thrilled! Don't wait! Act now (then)! Operators were standing by for your smoke signals! Dial three long puffs, two short, then four long...again, that's three long, two short, four long!

[Ozzy]

~~~--~~~

[JW_Halverson]

Kinda thought there were some mighty long puffs there.

[Dharma]

I am under the influence of four bowls of sugary breakfast cereal.

[YosemiteBen]

Y"all are HIGH larious!

[JackCrafty]

 

[chamookman]

That was the Ronco Pocket Point wasn't it  ?? To funny Guys  :laugh:Bob