Haha! Some of those blunders are epic! My greatest blunder was probably when I thought I'd just "try out" my new belt sander on some scrap wood. Since I was only "trying it out" I didn't worry about putting it properly in the vice, or other safety measures, just put it on the floor. After trying it for a while I turned it off, but it took a few seconds to stop completely, and during those seconds I accidentally touched the belt with my left hand. Schoff! My pinky and ring finger got completely stuck and squeezed in the machine. Immense pain. I was alone, closest neighbor a mile away. Phone far away in the house.
I eventually managed to get into the house and call a friend right when I felt I was going to pass out. He came and gave me a lift to the ER. Walked in there with the machine and everything. They had to pry me loose with some serious pliers. By that time my fingers had been in there for over an hour and the pain when blood started coming back to my fingers again was unbearable. Morphine does help though.
Machines can be pure evil.